You Better Werk, Werk it Gurl

Once upon a time, I was really involved in the real estate community and its organizations, and then I got super busy with work and my career that I stressed myself out, started binge drinking and getting angry at my then boyfriend, went to counseling for anger management and drinking, and finally became a semi-hermit for 5 years. The traveling for work and pleasure was great, but the constant socializing/networking kept me away from my kids and family. In 2004, I was the local chapter President for this women's real estate organization. Once my term was over, the slow unraveling of my career and life began.

Within a span of 6 months, I had one of the biggest break-ups of my then relationship, I purchased my first home, I FINALLY made a 6-figure income (a goal I cannot remember even setting-but I reached it and I was proud of myself), vacationed in Cancun and accomplished another life-goal of climbing the Mayan ruins of Chi Chen Itza (with then boyfriend who was texting and calling one of 3 girls he was seeing), and ending with my brother committing suicide on his 35th birthday.

Phew! No wonder I turned into a spazmatic hermit. I swore to never put my career before my family again and "turned to God" while in counseling.

Flash-forward to about a year or two ago when I began to attend weekly real estate marketing meetings and renew my membership with the real estate organization I once flourished in. The first several meetings, I would sit in the seat closest to the back door at any event/venue; I would keep my eyes cast downward, and avoid any "networking". Keep in mind that in 2007/2008 MANY folks in real estate had to abandon that career path for a REAL job, so most of these fresh faces had no idea who I was and I was so relieved for that.

Then came the questions about where I had been, what had I been up to, all questions I so badly wanted to avoid, and HAD avoided for 5 years. I still had a hard time talking about my brother and the downward spiral my life had taken. Do I lie and say everything is fine? Everything is perfect? I was just "taking some time off with my family"? Damn. Some of them had an idea, but I didn't really feel like discussing what a shit-hole my life had been and how I was finally digging myself out of in front of 50 other real estate people.

Needless to say, I just smiled and said life was good and I was ready to start getting back out there. A few of them pried and prodded, and I felt obligated to give them a quick rundown, much to my displeasure. It took almost a year for me to stop doubting myself and my knowledge/experience. I became more social and made new friends, though I don't care to be center-stage any longer. It wasn't attention that I needed, it was validation from an industry that was mostly older, white people; and there I was, a 18/19 year-old, Hispanic teen-mother trying to get her feet wet in real estate. I had finally acheived that in my mid/late 20s and I felt like I threw it all away, only to start over in my 30s.

I broke out of my cocoon at the end of 2010 by modeling for that women's organization, that almost 10 years before I had helped charter.

(That's me on the right, planting a smooch on a colleague.)

Adventures in Wine

Gone are the days of $100+ bar tabs. The occasional trip out for drinks or socializing has to count. San Francisco was once a weekly trip, now I might visit a few times a year. Wine tasting is almost sacrilege, being that we are a mere 40 minutes from Napa & Sonoma Valley.

In any case, we are making the best of what we have. The county I live in is known for its agriculture. My neck of the woods is known for apples, corn and cherries and is now adding grape vineyards and olive trees to make a realistic profit off land.

Back in the good ol' days (early 2000s), Brentwood's first Wine Bar opened in our downtown area. It was definitely a place to lounge and dip your toe in the world of wine. Over the last few years, it has switched owners and been re-vamped into a new kind of wine hangout.

This bottle of Educated Guess caught my eye while taking refuge in the wine bar from the sweltering heat of the Farmer's Market. I'm a math nerd, so I was drawn to the bottle like a moth to a flame. I have yet to try the wine.

I can't remember when I took this picture. I'm sure it was my first night back after not having been at the wine bar in a couple years.

This wine flight is all local wines. My favorite was Bloomfield's Devil's Daughter. The point of this picture was to remind myself to make this table. Most of the tables in the wine bar are wine barrels with glass tops. Each table is filled with different items. This one with the corks is my favorite.

The local vitners are banding together to get an appellation for their own wine label.

A REAL Post for 2011

The last several posts on my blog have been writing prompts from Plinky.com. I haven't had a diary for a couple years, mainly because my last complete one was taken along with many personal belongings (useless to those theives) that I left in a car. As much as I desperately need to write about some things going on in my life, I feel like this might not be the most appropriate place to post them, since it's not an anonymous blog. Who knows, the more I think about it, I might just say to hell with it and write about it anyway. We'll see as I type more...

In October of 2010, I switched real estate offices. I was getting fed up with the owners and managers constantly trying to be "friends" with the agents and gossiping about everyone. I can see this going on between co-workers, but it's not acceptable behavior for an owner or manager. The office I left had a few other locations, but I would always avoid having to go into the main office. I, too, started falling into that sink-hole of negativity. As much as I tried to reverse my bad-attitude for that office, some other issue would arise and I would be frustrated at the way management would handle it. It was like being in a bad relationship: both parties keep falling into their bad habits to the point that the only solution is just to walk away.

Real estate is still pretty slow. The banks aren't foreclosing on properties right and left, which means there aren't many homes out there for us to sell. Even if we do find a potential buyer, the lending requirements are still pretty strict, and not everyone is able to qualify. This lack of money is definitely starting to take a toll on me. I just want to be able to start paying bills again. Even though Francisco takes care of all the finances right now, it just not the same as having my own money. I don't think I could ever get to a point in my life where I would be okay with someone else making all the money - haha!

This past summer I attended a lot of local community events. Brentwood (my hometown) has Downtown Thursdays: car show, live music and street vendors in the evening. It was a nice way to spend the warm evenings out listening to a small band play while sipping on wine and chatting with friends/family. Saturday mornings were usually spent at the Farmer's Market, also in Downtown Brentwood. A seafood company from Santa Cruz would set up and we usually had a few raw oysters before heading into the Wine Bar for mimosas. Of course, this is after walking through the vendors, trying free samples and buying our fruits, veggies and olive oils. It was at one of these Farmer's Market Saturday's that I took a picture of my youngest enjoying a plum, which was later published in our local paper as a "Kid of the Week".


People from all over the Bay Area come to Brentwood around Memorial Day Weekend and into a few weeks of June to pick cherries. It's a huge event for some famililes. Growing up in Brentwood, I never knew what the big deal was. I just remember the streets and parks being packed with out-of-towners. My cousin drove out from Pinole with his kids, and my mom, baby Frankie and I joined him. We picked about 2 pounds of Bing cherries. They were DELICIOUS!

This is a pretty long post, so I'll catch you up on another day. There are still pictures and trips to Santa Cruz and the Boardwalk, Hazel's hamburger challenge, concerts in San Francisco, Neighborhood Clean-Ups, soccer games and college admittance...